Rediscovering Self in the Midst of Health Battles

There’s a deep, quiet grief that settles in with the news of a lifelong diagnosis—a reality that sinks in slowly, altering the future I once imagined. It’s not just about managing symptoms; it’s about mourning the health I once knew. Each day, I’m reminded that my body is navigating a path I didn’t choose, adjusting to new limits, new routines, and a kind of vulnerability that feels profound. It’s a journey marked by uncertainty, learning to coexist with a condition that will forever be part of my story. In facing this new reality, I find myself reimagining what health, strength, and resilience look like—not as fleeting moments, but as commitments to embrace each day with patience and compassion.

Embarking on this healthcare journey has left me grappling with emotions I hadn’t expected. When you’re told by a doctor that your health demands a new way of life, a cascade of “no-longers” and “cannots” falls into place: medications, dietary changes, the things you once did with ease now carrying the weight of health complications. There’s a fork in the road—one side with the lucky few who find everything is manageable, who can maintain their routines without disruption. But for me, it was the other side—the side that requires the acceptance of a new way of life and the strength to keep pushing forward.

In this journey of rediscovery, I promised myself intentionality—to peel back the layers, to uncover the parts of myself that had been quieted over the years. As I looked deeper, I found myself questioning the things I’d once silently accepted. I started to confront the “whys”: Why does this happen to my body? Why can’t all my health issues be dismissed as “just aging”? From persistent back pain and hip aches to changing vision and, yes, hair loss, I was left searching for answers that went beyond the surface.

In finding my voice, I realized I wasn’t alone in feeling silenced. When I met with a Black female provider, something shifted. She listened in a way I hadn’t experienced before—no interruptions, no quick dismissals. Instead of brushing aside my questions, she opened space for my concerns. I walked in with one issue but left with a deeper, unsettling reflection of how little I’d been heard in the past. I finally understood the profound sense of distrust people feel within the healthcare system.

The Power of True Listening in Medicine

This post is for every medical provider: we need more than what textbooks or insurance guidelines dictate. We need the human in healthcare. The Body Keeps the Score—a book many of us find ourselves referencing in moments like this—tells us about the lasting impact of trauma on our bodies. When healthcare ignores our voices, it can become another form of trauma. There’s a weight of being unheard and unseen, and when that happens in a medical setting, it imprints deeply, manifesting in both our minds and bodies.

For Black and Brown people, this is a particularly heavy burden. Navigating the medical field comes with a unique set of challenges, and the mistrust is rooted in countless experiences where we’ve been marginalized, dismissed, or underestimated. We’re not always given the same attention, and too often, we feel unseen, like we’re asking too much just by seeking quality care. The challenges we face aren’t just about physical health; they ripple into our mental and emotional well-being as well.

Why It’s Okay (and Necessary) to Question

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s the importance of asking questions—about the diagnosis, the medications, the suggested treatments. Health is not a one-size-fits-all experience, and it’s essential to question the things that don’t sit right, the recommendations that make us feel uneasy. Too often, we hold back because we don’t want to disrupt or challenge authority. But our health is too precious to leave unexamined. Our bodies speak to us, and sometimes that small voice in the back of our minds—the one that says “this doesn’t feel right”—is the one we need to listen to most.

To those of you reading this who may be on your own health journey, know that you are not alone in your struggles. Our health is a journey, and while it may not look like what we planned, every question, every moment of doubt, and every decision to keep going is a testament to our strength. May we continue to challenge, to advocate for ourselves, and to find compassion in every step of this journey, not just for ourselves but for everyone walking this path alongside us.